THE TORMENT OF SEPARATION

THE TORMENT OF SEPARATION
Poem by Mahmoud Said Kawash

I drank wine from separation without meeting you
And I drowned my wound with lilies and lavender
And I went with sorrows, spinning my sighs
A poem in which life melts in infatuation
And I confided my suspicions of the world with a pang
When it said to me, "Return, and you will not be blamed"
So why do you seek a small thing without patience?
Why did you yearn for it?
Return to guidance and do not plead for passion
For you who do not seek a place with the beloved
I defied my suspicions, then I left For her charm
Like lightning, I seek regret
I loved a coquettish woman and was confused about her affair
I gave her my heart and received reproach from her
She comes occasionally to whisper her passion
And disappears from him, whispering illusions
If she were present for an hour, she would revive a lover
In the month, she disappears, not seeing the days
I loved her sincerely and inclined to join her
So I returned complaining of estrangement and illness
**
**
And I called for a meeting with anguish
She turned away, "I don t want to" A whisper returns, grieving.
I take my first step in love.
And they said love might bring blame.
I love you from afar, and I won t increase.
Forget blaming me. Don t be a blamer.
And leave space between us, my beloved.
And throw my greetings, and my luck will return them.
I whispered to my heart about you, declaring my confusion.
And I found that it had built tents of dreams in you.
And I felt that my longing for the meeting was urging me on.
But I feared a blaze would ignite.
My beloved is in the tenderness of a breeze.
Unable to bear a friend melting in love.
And I fear a meeting whose purpose I do not know.
That it might scatter my passion and heart into darkness.
For this reason, do not insist on meeting.
As long as I fear a forbidden meeting.
Let me think. We might meet for -union-.
A path to feel the pride of your tenderness.
**
**
I sought the tails of time to reap a mirage. Incidents have watered him with clouds.
My longing has calmed me, and my sorrow has kept me awake.
And I have drunk from it a sip of wine.
What am I without my purchase?
I am a spring of longing that has not watered dreams.
I have inclined toward sorrows, spinning my sighs.
With my longing, I have composed poetry that keeps people awake.
So, at night, I have not been blessed with my slumber.
I have kept watch over those like me who have not slept.
I will not abandon my desire, no matter how stubborn it is.
I will continue to seek its -union-. Years
For her, I perform Hajj ten times every year.
From a thousand miles away, I declare Ihram.
For tomorrow, a little girl who has burned my blood will grow up.
And the full moon, my idol, will become completely annihilated.
She will feel, like me, what I am suffering from infancy.
And she will call her infancy the valorous one.
To melt in my arms like a sugar cube.
Dissolved in water and preserved a pledge of loyalty.

Mahmoud Kawash
Note:
Mudam al-Nawa means the torment and cruelty of separation. There is a big difference between mudam and mudama, which means wine..

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