Month of Pride

Charbel Batshoun
2022 / 11 / 26

It s the month to feel truly proud of yourself. It has nothing to do with your service to country, your academic achievements, your athletic prowess, your social graces,´-or-your philanthropic deeds.
Not because you improved through reflection and growth, not because your words´-or-deeds aided someone suffering wrongdoing.

Inserting your penis into another man s rectum and making it look natural is an impressive feat, and you should feel proud of yourself for accomplishing it. When your 12-year-old daughter comes out to you and says she s always felt more like a boy than a girl, you have reason to be proud. You have every right to be proud that your child, who can t determine what to do with -$-50 when you hand it to them, has chosen a gender.

You should be really proud of yourself because you woke up one day feeling that life is gloomy and chose to stroll around in some boobs to attract the kind of attention that women get when they re being dramatic.

You should be proud of yourself because you re a big reason why the LGBT industry can profit off of preying on your insecurities. You have every reason to be proud of the transformation of the rainbow from a purely aesthetic phenomena to a symbol of penises and vaginas newfound autonomy and the freedom to insert´-or-be inserted with whatever they choose. Your body carries a label of significance, which is something to be proud of.

It s an admirable stance to take, and one that should make you feel proud. You should be proud of yourself because when people of different sexual orientations work together, they can accomplish anything. Anyone can now marry whatever they desire, be it a kid, an animal, a tree,´-or-a chair. Be proud of your independence!

You can take pride in the fact that your humanity has been reduced to the level of your sexual behavior, preferences, and fantasies, no matter how sick´-or-twisted they may be. Your brains, soul, self and purpose don’t matter as long as your privates are publicly free.

You have every right to feel proud, as the very same organizations that promoted the idea that you were sick then are now promoting the idea that you have every right to feel proud of being sick.

You should be proud of yourself since you support an infinite number of organizations that say they want to safeguard your liberties. You should be proud of yourself because you contribute significantly to the success of the AIDS, transgender, abortion, sperm bank, media, trafficking of aborted fetuses, and chosen-gender maintenance industries.

You have reason to be proud of yourself, as you can now legally have two mummies, two daddies´-or-a number of daddies´-or-mummies surrounding you with the orgies of a life time.

You should be proud to know that we are no longer secular, but rather anti the God who prophesied disaster. You should be quite proud of yourself for sticking with the Sodom and Gomorrah experimentation until you prove God wrong.

The field of free expression has been neatly narrowed to either supporting the LGBT community´-or-the Jewish community, and you can feel good about that. Those who don t do so risk being labeled as anti-Semitic and homophobic, respectively.

Approximately 1400 years ago, the Muslims holy book made reference to the covering of the German football team s mouths as a show of support for the LGBT community.

Another Sodom and Gomorrah is on the horizon, and you have every right to be proud of that. You should be proud to learn that the manner in which you dispose of your penis and vagina is seen as a radical gesture of autonomy.

Take Africa s wealth without worrying about persecution, collateral damage,´-or-stealth. Classify humans in the human category in accordance with their skin color and hey, let Iraq burn in hell over the oil you stole and let Israel butcher as many Palestinians as they can. That’s perfectly fine as long as you’re proud!

Don t bother thinking about improving your species intellectual capacity. You should be proud that you no longer find the wild antics of your penis to be cause for concern and instead celebrate them.

Before the trial reports an error, stay focused on your pride will you?

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