For the attention of esteemed Gentlemen; heads of the myriad Syrian security branches. Their deputies; as well as their chairs.
May God bless you all and grant you the long living for the welfare of the Syrian people when they suffer of itch and miss the lash, or feel exhausted by day light and its dryness, as nothing smooth them but your lovely hands moving them to the dark wet cellars, even should they wish to go in contemplation and sit to think, they will get your gracious initiatives providing them with a single cell located deep down to ensure tranquility of thinking intact of any disturbance.
This is the Syrian Khalaf Ali Al Khalaf, and kindly accept my deep "apologies for not preceding my name with the prefix " Citizen" unlike the normal writing of official letters, since as you might not be aware " Citizenship" is a collection of Rights and Obligations, and when it comes to me, Gents: I am to be considered as a citizen only due to my nationality, since like the whole Syrian people, I havenít ever been in a position to enjoy the "Right of Citizenship " as you call it in your awful speeches.
Motivated by a high sense of nationalism and a strong desire to support our national economy, I ask you to save the amount of benzene which fuel your vehicles to reach my remote village in order to inquire about me, where I live and how I think. You are in great demand of this benzene in these hard times to face imperialism, Zionism, retardation, portrico and people of Eskimo!
Since you are well acquainted with the great fuel crisis in Syria which you ascribe to the conspiracies crafted by the great monopoly powers against you, kindly I offer you some important information about me and I d like you to add it to your files through cut and paste.
I assure you, sirs, that my poor mother, who is more than 70 years old; has never ever known one day how I lived or how I thought. Moreover, she still dreams that I would be a doctor to cure her joints in spite of the fact that I m in the forties. I also assure you that she is discontented from me more than you as I didnít live in my home village in Rika Governorate. I chose to live in Aleppo which is the most preferred cities in the world to me.
I can assure you also that my life of mutiny and rebellion started early in my life. At first I rebelled against my elder brothers who practiced guardianship as you do to all the Syrian people who can t live without guardianship.
My elder brothers donít know how I think and they donít read what I write.
They no longer dare to insult me as I hold the principle "everyone is responsible for himself". They donít know more information than this which I recorded in my file. This file is lacking a piece of information which I d like to add now.
While I was filing in the data which included all my life, my relatives life and all people I met by chance including the preferred games in my childhood I didnít remember my only aunt whose name is " Haira" . I assure you that she was born before the great June revolution. Therefore, her father called her Haira" as she symbolizes the confusion and puzzlement of the Great Syrian People. This confusion ended after gaining power from the leading party of the state, community, battle, stones and watercressÖÖ.
Of course, the military security branch has a comprehensive file about me as Palestine branch called me through them. Surely, any strategic analyst who appear on the screens can deduct the reason why they I was called.
You also know well that I learned since my early childhood hating monopolization, Zionism and retardation. Therefore, when I graduated from school I used to carry a big stone to hit monopolists if I saw them on my way.
I d like to tell you that poverty in revolutionary countries, unemployment and inequality are the fruits of the seeds plated by our wise leaders, their friends and relatives who usurped every thing and all the resources of the country. Since they (the aforementioned group) donít have a magic stick that enables them to satisfy the people of Syria, they couldnít satisfy them. They transferred all the net income and foreign aid to the banks of the monopolist West in highly confidential accounts. They did this for the interest of the Syrian people as this might stop the monopolists from annoying and harming them. Since all our money and funds are at the banks of the monopolist, they will not harm us.
The seeds of hatred which you planted in me against colonization made me rebellious against all colonization countries. Therefore, I tried hard to travel to those countries to fight them in their land. However, as they were very malicious, they knew my intentions and refused to grant me a visa. Therefore, I desperately resorted to "the center of Arab retardness", Saudi Arabia as you taught us. Since then 1993 I lived in that country.
Since that time, many principles changed in my mind. For example, I found out that Arab Nationalism is a great lie. Moreover, I found out that Saudi Arabia gave you grants and you insult it. Furthermore, you deposited privately the granted dollars from Saudi Arabia in your accounts. What exacerbated the problem is that you sell the granted dates and meat from Saudi Arabia.
I d like to tell you also that recently I like colonization and all great powers in the world because without their presence, you might kill us in the streets. What annoys me most is that you threaten us that if we annoy and you risk your powers, colonization powers might colonize us.
I assure that that I donít aspire to hold any political position. However, all my ambitions in life are to live a good life without humiliation. I know that you are disturbed now and want to find a charge to me! Donít be perplexed. I can tell you that I intentionally try to weaken the national feelings which are ruined by your lies.
I hereby with full legal competence and power declare that I hope you leave early in the morning by all means as you are used to theft, robbery, cheating and tyranny.
I acknowledge you that I didnít write for long about your faults and tyranny. I only focused my attention and my humble knowledge on criticizing the "Syrian opposition" as I m totally convinced that the future of this country is in changing the regime. Therefore, we should start from this point " the mechanism and method of changing the regime"
Sirs your time of departure has approached as your regime is the last and most tyrannous regime after the departure of the Iraqi regime.
Translated by Nuha Hanifa